Saturday 19 January 2008

2007 Feb 16th - Off Sick!

Friday, February 16, 2007


Off sick
Category: Life

Oh dear.

Just when I thought I was on top of things, two dodgy phone calls at work and I came down faster than a whore's drawers - to earth. With a big hard bump. Couldn't hack it, couldn't handle the relatively petty questions that were getting people so stressed - I mean who cares if you think the order for Oxford airport doesn't look right, so they'll get a few more magazines, it's only bloody magazines innit! To be fair I was almost on top of the tears until Paul asked how I was feeling - glad the loos are just across the hall. Of course you can't sob your heart out in a work toilet in a building that size without someone coming in and hearing you. Luckily it was Heather (friendly PA who "knows") and she made me promise to go home - and stop beating myself up about not handling things. I didn't want to tell Angela, but given the state of my blotchy face I didn't really have to say too much - I thought I was letting her down but she said I've done really well to last this long - I only started working for her again on Jan 2nd!

I don't think I can go back. I don't think I can go back to say goodbye or to be cheered up, I don't think I can even go back for the money. I cried all the way to mum's house and have spent the rest of the day with the sorest eyes ever and that empty tired feeling you get when you think you can't cry any more.

I bet after a couple of G&Ts and a few hours kip (hot gel bottle to expand catheterised vein and stop aching) and a new sunrise I'll be back to coping again but maybe it's finally time to stop trying so hard, it doesn't mean I'm giving in does it?

21:15 - 3 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment - Edit - Remove

Hayley

Only you would beat yourself up over this, I was amazed you even comtemplated going back after the picc - christ mate, you've got enough to be coping with without trying to be superwoman. It may have not gotten thru your thick skull yet but we are all trying to offer support and help, so maybe you should try leaning on us a bit if only to make us feel useful. Otherwise we just have to sit around watching you cope - not my favourite past-time. So do yourself a favour and let your family look after you or else I'm gonna have to book another bloody ticket to come and sort you out! theres more to life, however long it may be, than f*cking EMAP.

Posted by Hayley on Saturday, February 17, 2007 at 16:24
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Lisa Left Eye Loopylalalalala

um yes'm. Spending the day in bed today because it's my THIRD period in 49 days.

Posted by Lisa Left Eye Loopylalalalala on Sunday, February 18, 2007 at 13:11
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Umpalumpa

Cor blimey - well said Hayley!!!!!

Posted by Umpalumpa on Saturday, February 17, 2007 at 19:25

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